I have a home, a family that is still together and I've finally graduated from College... then why does it feel like I still can't get something from my mother. I've proved everything, or tried to prove anything to her, and I get nothing but shit. I try to make her happy and get nothing in return. I get a hey good job "BUT" there is always that but. I can't do everything in the FUCKING WORLD. My life is to short to even try.
I'm never going to be the President of the United States. I'm not going to be the next Masiha. NO!!! I'm going to be in the Fucking NAVY. If that doesn't please you then I don't know what will. Mom, I love you, I do. I've appreciates everything you have done for me. Never once have I asked for anything that large other then My college education. I can't give back the 4 and a half years of going to college, but I can give you a Navy Officer and something to be proud of me for. Then maybe I can be looked at like I accomplished something In my life. I was told today that I have nothing positive in my life. That I don't strive for anything. Nothing, nothing in my life pleases you anymore. Should I have left when I was 18? Going to strive for something that I could not achieve if I did leave? I might not have been the best thing you thought I would be. But I did try to make it in your life that would show me that I made something of myself. Nope I have to go away, get away from you, get away from all the downing that I get. From all the hates that are thrown my way. I can't get over how much you try to depress everyone around you and not try to tell people what is hurting you. You think no one appreciates you. No one cares about you. Well you're wrong. I care, I care for you, I care about you, I will always care about you.
You can't help everyone. You can't be everyone's protector. This is what is killing you. This is what's hurting you. Everyone will hurt you if you keep doing what you what you do. I can't help you everything, but it can't and That's that. Stop beating me up, stop beating yourself up.
