The Appending drink offs

Disclaimer: The names are going to be redacted for purposes of respect.
BAR CRAWL: part 1.

So this weekend the whole photography class, the ones that can drink, are going to do a bar crawl. Yes, we are going to dawn in our little shirt that say "SO IN SO CLASS OF PHOTOGRAPHY" or some pun like "I WAS TOLD TO AGITATE MY FILM, SO I CALLED IT A POLAROID". (If you don't get this, I'm sorry but you suck). But this is something that we want to do. We became close friends, and even this is not going to be a big bar crawl like ones that people do for their colleges. This is going to be big for us. This is were this comes in.

Now in the group we have some pretty competitive people. I know they probably won't admit it, but it's true. Me being one of those people, drink offs will most likely occur. In the group we have a new drinker. (A second blog will be posted after this bar crawl so her name will be now and then; Tinydrinker)... this being said, the rest of us has no reason not to get her drunk. Stick with us, and you will be plastered.

How this bar crawl starts is something like this. One of our very loud students, very bubbly, and very funny; Kungfu

Kungfu:WE SHOULD DO A BAR CRAWL

Seeing where this is going, one night to drink for a reason means I will be there

Eric: That's a freaken great IDEA!
TD: I've never been on a bar crawl
Eric: It's easy, you drink....

At this point in time the whole class is now in on what Tinydancer has just said. But give some credit, she is new to the game, so this should be fun. Now everyone knows that because it is going to be her first time, I feel that swimmies should be provided. Bar Crawl swimmies. This let's everyone know that she is in fact new to the scene of bar crawl... don't know how this will go though. I have my doubts. Doubts in her ability to drink, but no doubts about fun.

All in all, I'm going to competing with someone. It takes two to tango, two beers in one hand and two shots in another. Got to love Bar Crawls!

Dont Care, But Daddy Hates You

So tonight was the fun... I had a few drinks, more like 6 beers, more like 12 cause they were pint drinks, and a shot. I fell in love with the bar tender, she was a she, cool as shit!!! anyway, I got her a shot and she bought me a drink. All in all, I get somewhat warm, meaning at this time, I feel like I can somewhat rule the world.

Let me paint a picture for you. I am sitting outside with two of my friends (Let's call them Jstar, and Sam). I've known Jstar for about a year and a half now, and I've come to the realization that she is like me... meaning in we have sex, the world will stop. But, she's my friend and I stopped thinking about plowing her into the half a year of knowing her. Now she's my worst friend to hang with, her and I know what the fuck we are talking about when we don't even have to talk about. Sam, I just met about three months ago, and he looks like he should have an ax in one, and a big blue ox next to him.

How this title came to be, outside, we are chilling. I have to be honest, it is fucking cold I think I can be cool by not bringing in my jacket. I'm cold as shit, but then... I hear... Skanks. Yes, skanks, and Sam conforms this, with Jstars hatred of the ever growing party of legs and skimpy dresses. I did not think this could be at Mojos on Main. The Goth Place of Newark, but it is. There, a, I'm guessing 21st birthday party. Daddy's little girl will buy all the drinks that the card can afford.

Daddy;s little "girls" will do anything to get the attention that she wishes. They will do anything to get the attention. But instead I fall in love with the bar tender, which is awesome because not only do I get to do shots with her, she buys me a beer. Yes I am that cool. NOT really but being me, it feels pretty good to have a hot bar tender buy me a beer. Now Daddy issues is hot

Eric "Did I say happy Birthday?"
Daddyissues "NO! Thank you"
Eric "Buy you a shot?"
Daddyissues "SURE!"
Eric "Will this get me closer to fuck you?"
Daddyissues "WHAT?"
Eric "Moving On!"

I went back to Molly and say, Please drink with me, where she proceeded to do so.

All in all, Daddyissues will never be fucked by me. I've had to many "I hate my parents so I'm going to introduce you to them" type relationships, (tell me how that works out). I know this is kinda of a lame post but I still think it's kinda funny when the chicks who walk into a bar looking like they want to be fucked, turn out to be major posers and the ones behind the bar will love you till the end of time. I know that bar tenders will be your best friends, but I know that if Molly drank with me, she would love me!

God Hates Me

      I've come to the realization that, God, The Almighty, hates me. I had high hopes of maybe seeing the pearly white gates of Heaven before get kicked to hell and play blackjack with Hitler and Stanlin, but turns out, it doesn't see that way. I've came to this because of the hell weeks, yes plural. My hours were cut at work. I have a hard time even trying to get a date, and I'm once again alone while all my friends are in relationships.
     He literally laughs at me when I try to talk up a chick. Also the horrid dream that I cannot remember to save my life the night after I felt like shit the whole day really made me think that I stand no chance of getting to see those gates, or get to plead my case before the gate keeper.
    For the chick and no relationship thing, I know he is punishing me for not being nice to girls. For having the smallest attention span when it comes to relationships. Feeling like I'm the better one and that they all should bow to me. I don't know how I'm going to get back into the good graces of chicks unless I have a relationship with a sea-cow; no matter how desperate I am, I still have standards, and having sex with a 200something woman does not constitute better relationship statues. I even think God can give me a pass on that.
    For work, well it's work, what else can I say?
    For my friends, I am happy for them, but I hate being that dude that goes out, being the third wheel and all. I love my friends, don't get me wrong, I just feel like I'm in the way if I go out with them. Feel like I'm holding them back from doing what they want because I don't have a girlfriend, or even in a relationship to know how they feel. I'm so alone, and sometimes I like it. Other times, not so much.
   So God, if you read blogs. I promise I will be a better man, person, being, towards the next relationship I have, get, whatever. I love my friends, please let them know that, because for some reason I think they are starting to think that I don't care for them. Finally, let something fall in my lap work wise, this job is not working out, and if read the post on the job, you would understand. Sometimes I wish I could just fade away, like no one really knew me.
 A side note, please help my family come back together as a group, not where we all hate each other and want to rip hearts out like the dude did in Indian Jones. Don't think I have neglected you for so long, I just hadn't anything to prey for, I do now, and I hope you read blogs. 

Why Blog?

Some one asked me that the other day. I simply said that it's a great way to put down what you're thinking. It's a great place to just vent your anger with out beating the shit out of some one. For me it's a hiding place. I can come here and vent with out really no one knowing how I feel. I can just simply type what I feel and how I feel about certain things. It's fun...

I Broke, I Caved

I showed something that I do not show often, my emotions. I hate that, I hate that I was so weak that I could not hold it in. She asked and I caved. Why, I don't know why. I felt better but I hated letting lose, hated making someone hear my shit. I write all this shit about how no one wants to listen, no one is there to hear me. I've never had someone there to listen, so I've learned to bottle it up. Become someone that shows little emotion, and feels really nothing. It's kinda sad how I've come to this. Being the only child has its ups and downs. No brothers or sisters makes it hard to talk to someone about the shit that parents just won't understand. On the flip side, no brothers and sisters means I have more time to spend with the parents.
I've come to a conclusion that I'd never be able to share something unless it takes hold of me. I wanted to drop it, but she was asked, and asked, and finally broke, and hated every minute of it. Why I hated it because I didn't want her to know what makes me hate myself sometimes. But I'm glad she asked, even though I hated telling her.

To Fit, Or Not To Fit, That Is the Question?

So over the course of a few weeks, I've been TALKING to someone. I've found that even men get overwhelmed with the constant nagging of someone who potentially does not fit. When I say FIT, I mean you have to FIT me. I leap before looking and I want someone to join me, not sit on the sidelines and go "Yeah, babe, that was cool"... no, I want you to take my hand and jump. Not off a bridge, or in a pit of fire, but do something you've never done, or tasted, or seen before. I love different things, and I want someone who loves different things as well.
I'm never going to find someone that will love the same shit I will, but never say never. I love to try new things. If you say it's good, I'll try it, I may not like it, but I tried it. You don't fit because you don't fit. I don't know how else to say it. I live in the past, present, and future. I live in the moment of LIFE, in the moment when something interesting is happening, I want to be there. I want you to experience it too. I want to take you by your hand and say "COME ON, LET'S TRY IT..." it maybe scary, but guess what, I'm right there with you. Every step of that new glorious thing I like to call, EXCITEMENT. If you don't like, at least you  now have a reason not too.. :)
There comes a time when you have to adapt with your surroundings, to compromise when a compromise can be given. But to say that you won't flat out do it when YOU'VE NEVER TRIED, is not a compromise. Even to a person you're interested in. It's not fair to them. You won't FIT because you just WON'T FIT. I hate to say that, but baby, I love excitement.
Sure you love sports, camping, and other things, I like them too. But I find that not only will you not FIT me, you won't FIT my friends. I know, I know, me dating a girl solely on how my companions feel is childish. But you have to find someone who loves what you and the companions do together. I don't want a girl who I'll have to leave home because I go somewhere she's never been, but says I DON'T LIKE IT. For that statement, let me be clear. If I decide to go cave diving, and she say's I'M AFRAID OF SMALL SPACES, I'll understand. But if I go cave diving and she say's, I DON'T LIKE CAVE DIVING. HAVE YOU EVEN BEEN? NO... THEN HOW THE HELL DO YOU SAY YOU DON'T LIKE IT? Try baby, try it. If you get into the mouth of that cave and say FUCK NO, IT'S TO DARK AND SMALL... I'll say OKAY, BUT GUESS WHAT, YOU CAN NOW SAY YOU DON'T LIKE IT BECAUSE IT SCARES THE BE-JESUS OUT OF YOU.
That's all I ask for. That's all anyone asks for. The sports package, and camping gear is a plus, but please, please, don't say you don't like something if you've never tried it... Just try it, don't say no, because one day, trying new things won't be an option in life anymore.

On the Road Again

I finally am able to get off from work. Every great once in a while do I enjoy a day to have fun. Like take tomorrow. Sept. 11th, 9/11... Tenth Anniversary for the Trade Center attacks. So I take that Sunday off, seeing that it would be nice to do something on that day. But something popped into my head, "HEY OUT THERE, GO TO GROUND ZERO" I didn't know what my mind was saying "GROUND ZERO". Then it dawned on me, Go to New Your and see Ground Zero. Mind you this would be my second trip up if I decided to go. But then it hit me again, my conscience speaks again "TENTH ANNIVERSARY". Yes thank you I know this... So I'm heading to New York tomorrow, to see Ground Zero, take a lot of photos, and cry with the person standing next to me as we shout int the streets of New York "USA, USA, USA"!!

ART

When one hears the word "ART" one thinks of great paintings and pictures that have real thought behind them. Nope I went to this almost unbearable, almost unbearable, art show. I don't know what some people consider art, but when I first walked in, I saw a hallway full of hands, hands on the wall holding things. Random things that made little sense to art. I thought that maybe, just maybe this little "ART" show was going to be interesting. Boy was I wrong...

After the hall of hands, I proceeded into a room, on the wall was a painting, at least I thought it was a painting. To confirm this, I did the "FERRIS BUELLER" poss, turn the head and stare at it. I soon deciphered  this painting, there was a tub in it... the tubs spic-kit was poring out blood... in the tub there was a door... under the tub there was a small arm, this I presumed was the owner of the tub. This made me kinda angry, only because it was called art. I left the "ART" and found the best art in the damn building, beer...
Beer, but soon I realized that I was now mad at the beer. Why? Because it was PPR, a shitty art gallery that served shitty beer, that's a joke all in its self. Now I'm pissed, only because I have to drink this shit and look at these things that they call "ART". "FUCK ME".
So now I'm pissed drinking this shitty beer, looking at these shitty paintings and displays of "ART", but then a light shines in. A man walks into my life. He presents me with one thing, a new direction to a better beer selection. Thank you for doing something right. Go figure they make the better beers in the deeper part of the "MUSEUM", (that's what they called it, I'm just stating a fact). After this I find that even with a slight buzz, I mean a feel warm buzz do I find that those paintings are still shit. Not to mention the buildings heat is on and the smell of "ARTIST" is starting to fill the air. It's not even half way over before we get on the bus to go back to campus. This night is getting "better", I don't know whats worse now, the smell or the "ART", maybe both... I don't care what you say, I love art, but that...that made art a laughing stock. Forgive me if I seem uptight, but I could have done something better with the three fucking hours I spent in that GOD OFFAL place.
Next time I get asked to go to an "ART SHOW" I'm making sure it's a nice museum that has real paintings, and AC that works. 

The Great Awakening

Two in one day, this is interesting.. but I had to get it out.
     This is not about me, not about a rant or rave that I feel I should enlighten people with. No this is about someone who will remain nameless (she knows who she is)... My friend, who to be honest with, I've really only gotten to know her maybe a few months ago this past year. But this girl, very stubborn girl by-the-way, was saved by her awakening. Not all men are created equal. To sum this meaning up, she found that men with big muscles, big egos, and tiny you-know-whats, are really not there to please her, but there to please themselves. The ones who look for a good lay and then go bad mouth the chick, who they just got done "smashing", to his buddies and laugh about it. The ones who take pride in how much they can bench and how much they've spent in the gym rather than with their girl friends. But enough about them, cause this is not about them, this is about her.
    I call her stubborn only because when I was with her, she would look at this guy and be "AHH FUCKING SEXY", yes he was, I'm man enough to admit that he was "nice" looking... meaning I would have no chance in hell if I was in a room full of girls and he walked in, I'd have to go home a sit in front of the computer. But there he was and there she was, ready to pounce on him like a lion to its prey, that man was going down. But something stopped her... maybe it was the fact that she was somewhat scared, okay maybe it was all scared, but she didn't pursue  him. Instead she talked to the last guy I would have pictured her, of all people, to be talking too. A dude who was actually cool because he was cool. Not some dude that was cool because people said he was cool but didn't want to hang out with him, not that type of cool. No, he was cool.
    Maybe something finally got through to her, or maybe she just woke up one day and said, "FUCK PLASTIC DUDES WHO CARE LITTLE ABOUT ME. IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE WAY I LOOK, OR CARE ABOUT ME ONLY TO GET A GOOD HUMP, GET THE FUCK AWAY". But then I read her blog, NERDS... nerds baby, yes to all nerd-kind!! This was not just a small awakening, no, no ladies and gents, this was a huge awakening. Someone, a girl, realized that NERD was the way to go!
   Maybe it's a sign that more women will be looking to us NERDS for future holdings at night, or a good morning romp under the covers, who knows. But I pray that soon all women would have an epiphany like she did. Then maybe, just maybe, instead of me sitting in front of a computer, the "nice" looking man would have too. Flexing his muscles in the multiple mirrors he has in his room, and asking "WHAT WENT WRONG?"... you did my friend, you did..
   So I leave you with this NERDS RULE!!

Oh, Work...

I've come to the realization that work is not all fun and games anymore. When did I come to this, when I started a shirt an tie job. Who'd a thunk it? Not me that's for sure. But it fell in my lap, and at the time I was 19, jobless, and needed some bucks. Three years in corporate America, and you start to get a bad taste of the dreadful 9-5 job that lingers on the horizon after college. They call it a stepping stone for the future, I feel it's more of five stepping stones backwards with no end in sight.
I really don't know why I'm still there, but those three things still pop in my brain that make me punch in to that shirt an tie job, Money, Bills, and an inevitable move out of the parents house to live on my own. Those are the three things that make me cringe at night. Make me not sleep for hours on end because I feel like, "DID I PAY THIS? DID I PAY THAT?" the nagging questions of "WHAT WILL THE FUTURE BRING WHEN  I MOVE OUT?" Don't get me wrong, I may bitch to high heaven about it, but it once again, pays my bills, and even helps me get a good BUZZ going every great once-in-awhile.
A BUZZ that may eventually place my foot in the right door of society and have a new job sweep me off my feet. Yes in order to love your job you must love it. My job, I do not love, and it swept me off my feet and dropped me on my head. Ever see those comedies where the couple in the movie gets married and he sweeps  his bride of now of her feet only to slam her head on the door jam... yup that poor girl is me, and my job just keeps slamming my head in the door jam of society.

Un-known

     Well here I am. In the mist of all the bloggers. I've always wanted to try this, but was to afraid that my words might indeed hurt someone. I never really understood what it was all about. To come on these type of things and just spill your heart out to random people who may or may not care. But here I am, typing away like it's something I did for awhile. I guess I just have to look at this as one big journal entry, so people could read about my insignificant life, as if anyone cares as to how I feel or what I think about society. I feel like they won't, but I'm on here none the less, talking to you random people who will surely find some reason to post on here and say "Fuck you".
    Blogging is not a job, it's a hobby. Just like writing a journal, or pestering your friends with things like "She DOESN'T LOVE ME" or "MAN MY DAY WAS GREAT". I really feel that if you want to blog, do it, but talk about something people will love. It's poetry what you type, what you look for in a great blogger. Those political bloggers and analysts of movies; those are the ones that are interesting. But this blog is about neither, why because I just don't care to much about politics, nor do I care what people have to say about movies because you know what, I'm going to go out and see the fucking things whether someone says its great or just plan shit.
    See I'm a risk taker, not really, but I like to think I am. I place myself in front thousands of people. My thoughts, my dreams, my aspirations. Fears and loves, it's all going to happen. Blogging world here I come!!